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How To Handle Your Haters In The Most Non-Petty Way Possible

In the legendary words of 3LW: “Playas, they gonna play and haters, they gonna hate. That’s the way it is, that’s jus how it’s been”.

We have all experienced being hated on in one way or another, especially if you’ve seen certain successes in your life. According to Urban Dictionary, haters are people that simply cannot be happy for another person’s success. So instead of being happy, they make it a point to expose the flaw in that person to devalue or invalidate their success.

Hating is nothing new, but with the rise of social media and the way that we are all publicly sharing our lives online, the hating epidemic has become a poisonous disease that needs to be handled appropriately.

We know that it can be tough to remain cool, calm, and collected when someone is coming for you, but instead of stooping down to their level and taking a petty route, we came up with some positive ways to handle haters. These options are guaranteed to keep you at the top and keep THEY at the bottom where THEY belong:

What’s their beef? Let’s Address it. 

Without allowing a hater to warrant you, figure out what their issue is with you. Maybe it can be squashed? Focus on their subtle purpose for hating on you. Doing this will give you a sense of relief and let you know how to handle them. After you figure out what their problem is with you use their hate as positive fuel. You can appreciate the purpose of haters once their energy is designated appropriately. If this hater is a friend, family member, or co-worker, addressing it head on will blow their mind and put them on the spot. They will know that you see them and notice their evil ways and after that conversation, the only choice they have is to stop verbalizing their hate for you because now they look stupid. Sadly the closest people to you can be your biggest haters and they should not be allowed in your inner circle. Shut it down or let them go! #BYEFELICIA

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POSITIVITY & CONFIDENCE.

Again, as cliche as this may sound, you must use their negative hate as fuel to your positive fire. Haters hate on people who they envy. The reason why you have haters is because you are doing something that they want to do but can’t do for whatever personal reasons. Realizing that a hater is simply an admirer with low self-esteem will help you create the ultimate hater-blocker shield. The shade that they throw at you will not affect you anymore because you are 100% confident within yourself and you know they are just picking at your losses to make your wins less admirable.

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IGNORE IT.

In the words of the hilarious Vine/IG comedian, Shod Santiago: “BLOCK!”. Ignoring a hater is the easiest way to handle them, they are not people that you need anywhere near you or in your life. Block anyone who is pouring negative and alternative facts into your life on social media and IRL (in real life). Distance yourself from negative co-workers, friends, and family, even if it hurts. Block random trolls on social media, even if that means losing a couple thousand followers. Out of sight, out of mind.

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In conclusion, you must remember that haters are fascinated by you. Have you ever read the comments under successful people’s pictures on Instagram? A large majority of the comments are irrelevant and negative. Why do trolls follow celebrities that they do not like or have so much negative stuff to say about them? Well, it’s because they have nothing better to do and their entire lives revolve around being obsessed with someone else’s life because they don’t have an interesting life of their own.  The more you live your best life the more they are going to hate. Seeing you happy is the reason why they are hating, so keep doing you with a smile, it will make them cringe.

Good luck and keep your hater blockers up!

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'ILY FOREVER' Recap

WARNING: I'm about to go in and freely write....spelling, grammar and syntax are out the door right now, sorry grammar police. 

I would have hated to leave for New York without seeing and saying goodbye to some of my greatest friends, mentors, and supporters. If you know me you know I love people, especially my people. In preparation for my transition, I unknowingly found myself distant from a lot of people that I loved and held near and dear to my heart. I found myself out of the "loop" and off of the "scene" unless it involved my work, although my work is low key the "scene" sometimes lol. 

I am such a perfectionist and go-getter that I tend to block everyone and everything out to accomplish my goals (working on it). To those who don't understand me, it might come off as me being "distant" or being a "flake" when I don't show up to things that I normally would have. Truth is, I really had to lock in if I wanted to reach my fullest potential and do everything that I knew I could do and that I had set out in my heart to do. Nothing against anyone but the past year or two has been all about me zoning in and figuring myself and my path out. 

I am an avoidant and procrastinator, mix that with perfectionism and you get a hot late ass mess sometimes (working on it). I suck at texting and picking up phone calls, (working on it lol), but trust me if I've ever called you a friend, I love you and I'm still here. Hit a playa up. 

Any who...I'm rambling lol but I knew I wanted to have one last hoo-rah before I left just to see everyones face and remind them how much they mean to me. So, last minute (literally a week or two before the event LORDT) I decided to throw a cocktail hour to celebrate my move. Since I never had an "official" launch for 'Pennie For Your Thoughts' I incorporated that as well.

Side Bar: Pennie For Your Thoughts is a multidimensional platform that instills empathy, humanity, and psychology in media and through the entertainment industry. 

Yea...so, I put together a last minute shindiggity called "ILY FOREVER " aka "I Love You Forever". I love Houston and the people I have met during my life long time in Houston, forevaaa *Cardi B Voice*. No matter where the world takes me, I FUCKING LOVE YOU. I want to thank everyone who came even though I literally text you all a couple of days before. 

Being a quote on quote well known and connected person can get estranged. Figuring out who is truly for you vs. who just rocks with you because everyone else does or because you can do something for them will forever be an on going battle. I realize more and more everyday who is in my corner for the right reasons. 

Here are some photo's from the event. It was open bar and we most definitely got faded AF lol. Thank me because I spared most of ya'll and didn't post some photos cause y'all had those twisted eyes lol. Thank you to Ella for letting me use CrumbVille, go and get your sweet tooth fix from there if you're ever in Houston. Thank you to Russell for bartending and thank you to Lyssa, Faye, and Yusef for putting up with my CRAZY ASS. 

ALSO, shoutout to everyone who came to the after party that was thrown by me, Blake Campbell, and DJ Youngstreetz. We had way too much fun, I barely remember it lol but what I for sure remember is the love and energy. THANK YOU. I'm done...lol 

xoxo,

Pennie For Your Thoughts 

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